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				Psychology of the Liar
		Here is a brief list and description of some of the character traits of a habitual liar.  If you notice some of these traits in a person you are dealing with then you may be prudent in paying more attention to your interactions with that person in order to protect yourself from potential manipulations. - Role playing / cubby-holed life  Liars tend to change greatly in different environments.   While we all are subject to some changes in behavior in different settings, we're talking radical changes with the Liar.  The Liar tends to have more "situational ethics", meaning his values, as reflected by his behavior, will be different in different situations.  Who is watching is an important factor.  Because the roles the Liar plays often reflect totally different value systems, these people frequently try to keep various groups they associate with completely separate.  Be wary of a potential mate or partner who somehow neglects to have you freely mingle with their friends, family, co-workers, etc. - Lack of genuine emotions  Driving home late one night with a seemingly sweet lady we came across a tragic scene where a fox had been killed on the road and its mate was so distraught that it refused to get out of the road until we were almost up on it.  Moved by this animal's devotion to its dead mate I got out and put the dead animal off on the side of the road.  My companion's only comment was, "They're cute!"  She didn't get the emotional content of the situation.  People who were abused as children may not develop emotions like other people. Their abusers showed no empathy for them and thus they may not know what empathy is for other people.   They may experience a few basic feelings such as anger, fear and lust but higher level emotions are seemingly just not there.  In order to fit in with people around them the best they may be able to do is fake certain emotions at times. - Refusal to take responsibility for behavior  If confronted about his behavior the Liar will most often blame other people or fabricate excuses.  Even when faced with overwhelming evidence the Liar may refuse to admit any responsibility.  What's more, the Liar may actually sound believable in these denials if one didn't know them to be false.  This may be due to much practice or potentially something like multiple personality.   - Multiple personality / dissociative identity disorder (DID)  When a child is exposed to overwhelming trauma, pain, and sexual abuse, especially if her parents and caregivers are involved, there is no physical escape possible so the only escape may be in the mind.  The child cannot care for herself, she is dependent on others for survival.  The only way out of this dilemma is to create amnesia splits in her mind.  It is as if some other person suffered the abuse.  That other personality then holds the memories of the abuse so that the child can continue to be with the parent in non abusive situations.  Dr. Colin Ross, a noted authority, states that this disorder is real but that the personalities themselves are not real in the sense of being real separate people.    Not all liars are DID.  People with DID are often very careful to cover up evidence of it for fear of being labeled crazy or out of fear of what other alters may have done and they will be blamed for.  On the other hand a liar might find it convenient to claim DID as a simple excuse.      While we certainly want to protect ourselves and our loved ones from Liars, It is well to keep in mind the often tragic situations which help create such people.  Personality disorders are frequently passed down multiple generations.  Let us strive to create situations which foster the development of sane people.  There, but for the grace of God, go you or I. -Character disorders  This is different from multiple personality, DID, in that the person is completely aware of their actions but has no sense of guilt or remorse.  Serial murderer Ted Bundy is a most extreme example.  He appeared to know exactly what he was doing and was capable of being quite charming when that was in his best interests.  Like DID, this disorder can have its basis in childhood abuse. - Somatic complaints  Mental and emotional problems often show up as physical pains and problems in the body.  The link between the mind and the body is far more complex than many people realize.  Headaches, stomachaches, and a host of other ailments often have mental/emotional causes.   -Addictions pose a needs  The Liar may buy into the illusion that whatever he is addicted to is a genuine need.  Rather than striving to upgrade this addiction to a preference, or eliminating it entirely, he spins out manipulations in search of satisfaction. -Sense of being special  For example, sexually abused girls are often told they are lucky and "special" by their abusers.  They may have no way of knowing how much of the rest of the world they are being cut off from by such abuse.  Being special means that the rules which apply to others do not apply to them.  A childhood victim of incest, for example, may feel that if "God's Laws" can be broken so easily, then the laws of men are nothing at all. - Not growing up  Abuse and neglect tend to freeze people at certain childhood levels of development.  They may look and seem to act adult, but some of their core thinking is stuck in childhood thought patterns.  These core thought patterns tend to come out more strongly in stressful situations or in times of satiation.  Abusers may seek to keep the victim stuck at an immature level as a way of keeping them in bondage.
	Motivation to Lie              An important but sometimes neglected part of detecting lies is understanding the possible motivations of the liar.  We have all heard people protest, "But why would he lie to me?  He has no reason to lie to me..."  This may reflect limited thinking.  Sometimes in order to detect lies one has to be willing to think the unthinkable.   No one can be considered to be completely above suspicion.         A person might tell lies to cover up any of the following: - Sexual affairs or other improper behavior - Addictions - Blackmail, threats - Covering for others - Work related secrecy - "Code of Silence" training - Secret society membership - Effort to control you or others - Vanity - Habit - Resisting change - Fear, paranoia - Surprise - Mental condition